Our first own little christmas

This Christmas was our first own little Christmas without family. Just us three (+baby boy). We went to the Trail of Lights here in Austin, which will now be a new tradition for as many years as we live here. Lincoln had special seating right up on daddy's shoulders for the whole trail. We thought about having his picture taken with Santa while we were there, but that thought was squashed in about 30 seconds when we saw how long the line was. So what does any lazy but somewhat creative parents do? Just pose in FRONT of Santa, and maybe photo shop the other kids out? Well, at least we got a picture with Santa in the background....close enough. 

Christmas Eve we went over to some friends for a little while and then made a drive around neighborhoods with gas-station hot chocolate on our way home. Since we were in a residential area, we brought Lincoln up front to sit on my lap to get a better view of the lights, but all he was interested in was pulling on the visor and cranking up the radio and pushing buttons and trying to open the door. He lasted maybe one block or two before we put him back in his car seat. 

I know our gifts look bare. Funny things is, is that two of the three gifts you see wrapped are from the in-laws. And all the little gifts for Lincoln were from my parents. The only thing we bought Lincoln was a train set I found at a consignment store for $20. With the train set and gifts from Papa and Nana, he scored big time. SHHHH. I even put half of the gifts they gave him away for his birthday. :)

Oh, and then there was the brilliant idea of decorating sugar cookies. I tried to make it as easy as possible and buy the pre-made dough that only requires you to slice and put on a cookie sheet. Apparently that's still a little too complicated for me. Mine turned into a sugar cookie sheet. I ended up getting a cookie cutter and cutting a few and thought, screw it. I don't care if they are perfect circles. They're all going to the same place right?

Good thing I didn't take the time. Lincoln didn't care for the cookies, or frosting, or sprinkles. He's weird like that sometimes. Or maybe he refused to eat the cookies because they were ugly and odd-shaped.

But he was pretty dang stoked about his Santa pancakes I made. It's a good thing he doesn't really understand Santa because he would have told me off right away saying, "This doesn't look like Santa!" And I would have replied, "you're right kid, they sure don't." Thanks pinterest for making our food look creepy. 

And this picture just cracked me up. I was making our hot chocolate and thought, as I was admiring our pretty hot chocolate, "Parenthood must mean having toy rifles on the counter."

And lastly, our new christmas ornament this year!!! We do one every year and I was so unoriginal and bought a texas state ornament. It's pretty cool but pales in comparison to what Ryan bought. He's never bought one before and of course the first time he does, he showed me up big time. If you didn't see the photo I posted on instagram back around Halloween, we had an owl get into our house that nearly gave me a heart attack and luckily didn't scar Lincoln with owl-terrors. Anyway, Ryan was the hero and caught the owl. He found an owl ornament and now, every year when we hang up the brown owl we can re-tell the story of the owl getting in the house through the fireplace. Good times. :)

anyway, we hope y'all had a great and merry Christmas!

mothers

And since I saw all my mom friends posting these ADORABLE pictures of them and their kids being all cute....I thought I'd share MY Mother's Day pictures.

This is what I got: Lincoln giving DAD the kiss and the other?

Him squirming out of my arms to push the stroller. 

This is my mother's day picture, just keeping it REAL folks. :) 

I'm not sure what's funnier. Lincoln looking like he's busting out of his diaper??

 or me getting kicked in the bladder but still smiling about it??? What I'm really thinking is: "Lincoln, let go of this stupid stroller and act like you love me gosh DANGIT!!!!"

Ryan walked through the door a few weeks ago after work and told me to close me eyes. I love surprises, especially from Ryan. He can be surprisingly romantic. Well, I close me eyes, and when he tells me to open, he has a bouquet of daisies held out for me with a big grin (I'd take daisies over roses ANY day). As pretty as the flowers were, what was even more beautiful were the words he said to me after.

And, in summary, this is what he said. 

I wanted to get you flowers to show you how grateful I am you are able to be home with Lincoln. I know it is hard work, but it's the most important work you could do as a mother. You are a great mom and wife.Lincoln and I are blessed to have you.

Those words were simple but extremely meaningful to me, especially since I've struggled emotionally on becoming a mother even before Lincoln was born. A little background of my struggles...

Ryan and I were married almost 5 years before we got pregnant. He had brought up the "baby-talk" several times in our marriage, but I managed to either sway the topic of conversation onto a different path, or pacify him saying "I'm not quite ready now, I feel I will be soon..." He was ready, I was not. As I look back now, my fears were mostly a result of not feeling like I would be a good mother. I had COMPLETE lack of maternal instincts. I thought my desire would eventually come, but I preferred looking at babies only from a distance. I felt like those maternal instincts and love for babies would eventually find its way in my heart.

And then we got pregnant, unexpectedly.

Before Lincoln was born, I had no hesitation going back to work. I was lucky to have a job I LOVED-- My boss, my friends at work, my hours..... I was foolishly convincing myself that having a baby wouldn't affect me working as a nurse.

But something someone changed whatever plans I had for myself.

Lincoln was born and my life changed. And I knew within the first week of maternity leave I couldn't go back to work as a full-time nurse; I couldn't leave Lincoln with someone else to care for him while I was gone all day. My priorities changed. Any desires that I had for myself were set aside, and the desires I had for Lincoln became my priority.

I knew I wanted to be the one to be home and raise him myself. I wanted to be the one he saw first in the morning and after his naps, I wanted to be the one to feed him, play toys with him, read to him, and chase after him. I was there the first time he rolled over, the first time he crawled, the first time he stood and the first time he walked. It's not always easy; it can be tiring and frustrating and I'm working on my patience daily. Some days I think working 2 shifts a month aren't enough, and most days I still feel inadequate as a mother, but through the good, the bad, and sometimes ugly parts of raising a child, I know I am doing the Lord's work and that is the most beautiful thing in the world. I cherish the divine calling I have of being a mother, especially Lincoln's mother. :) I'm grateful 14 months ago I got to become a mother to this wonderful boy..... 

And through everything I have experience so far with Lincoln, my appreciation for my own mother has grown heaps and bounds. She has always been an example of a selfless caring mother and I love her for all that she has, and continues to do for me.

This picture is a few months old, but it's definitely one of my favorites.

the one from Easter

Lincoln is going through a funk right now. I think the genes he got from his mom are taking over with a vengeance because all he wants to eat is bread. I promise I had a bunch of food on his tray before I took this picture. Anything that isn't bread gets a quick swipe onto the floor. He's slowly breaking out of his bread funk and actually ate some tomatoes and carrots yesterday. It's quite unfortunate he is being so picky during this Easter dinner. He missed out on some of Gma Tina's ribs and sweet potatoes. :)

And guess what was part of Lincoln's Easter basket but not necessarily IN it. 

Papa and Nana Z built his first fort!

I really need to take more pictures to show off their awesome work. His fort came equipped with a little bow & arrow and basket hanging from the entrance....thank goodness for awesome grandparents who go above and beyond to compensate for the parents who didn't even by their own child an Easter basket. :) That's just in their job description of being a grandparent right?

Happy Easter!

my 5 star reservation with Ron Swanson

Lincoln has been sick all weekend..... including Valentine's night. But that put no damper whatsoever on our plans. Ryan and I didn't even go out of the house to celebrate. But why would we? Going to some busy restaurant, not being able to hear each other? Not our style. Instead, we decided we would put Lincoln to bed, dress up, and cook what we want to eat TOGETHER at home in the comfort of our own kitchen. We had some lights strung, a candle lit and my flowers in their vase, and Jack Johnson on Pandora. Now THAT'S a 5-star reservation.

^^ oh ya know, just chugging the sparkling cider like a champ.

 ^^ when I asked Ryan what he wanted us to make for our valentines dinner he said "my number one favorite food, wrapped around my number three favorite food." Bacon-wrapped shrimp it is, Ron Swanson.

NEW YEARS EVE!

I know everyone, and their mom, were taking sparkler pictures new years eve. BUT this was my first time taking them and it was freaking SWEET. We had so much fun goofing off with the sparklers and by "WE" i mean the girls. The boys were off being pyromaniacs! 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

just testing out the new tripod.

don't mind us, just testing out the new tripod.

our inner-vogue shined through when you have the timer set to take multiple shots.
thanks for the new tripod, little bro.

well Christmas morning ended up being all that I thought it would NOT be. I was stoked for Lincoln to come down and be smiling and giddy and tearing off the wrapping paper..... but then reality kicked in and I remembered he's only 9 months old and he was not, in the least, interested in a toy he couldn't even see because of that dang wrapping paper.

It was still wonderful, of course, because it was still his "First Christmas" and we able to head over to Nana and Papa Z's for the day. He made out like a bandit with some new bath toys, cars, Buzz and Woody, and lots of books. And it was special this year because he was included in our Christmas Eve tradition of new pj's.

I'm pretty sure every picture I got of him that day was that same blank stare. I thought it was because he just woke up....but it lasted all day. I'm sure he was just holding back all the excitement because he was so overwhelmed. :)

Santa was waiting for Lincoln when we got to my parents. I think he was still traumatized from his Santa experience at the mall.

yep, later that afternoon and still sporting the same blank look. I gotta give it to him, he can keep a serious face for quite some time. Merry First Christmas Lincoln! :)  

she's for hire.

This post is to praise my mom and talk about how awesome she is....because she really is. And one of her many many talents is her table settings. Anyone who knows my mom knows how she can find the neatest things at thrift stores. So, whenever we celebrate any holiday with a dinner, the table is always perfectly embellished with her vintage finds. She's proud of her table settings and I'm proud of her and the boys are just happy when we're done taking pictures of it so they can eat. ha. We were taking pictures and decided the red and green Solo cups were a bit distracting so we took them off until dinner time. I'm just excited that one day all her decorations will be passed down to me. :) Shouldn't she start a business?

We had some people over from Peru who didn't speak a lick of English. So when I had a total brain fart and claimed I was 25 but found out I was actually 26... I was extremely happy they couldn't understand everyone correcting me as I sat in complete stupor and shock. I had the excuse that my birthday was only a few months ago and it takes me a solid 6 months to remember my "new" age.

thanksgiving 2014

A Shideler Ranch view + jacuzzi tub + rubber duckies = HAPPY BATH TIME!

I barely took any pictures on my camera. But the few I got was all the proof I needed to show how awesome of a family I married into. Trying to get everyone together for a family photo, and a decent one at that (meaning seeing everyone's face--smiling or not) is always an adventure in itself. There's about 20 more of these photos before we got one "frame-worthy" picture. :) Only downside, we're missing some  family who were in Denver, and Lincoln, who was surprisingly upstairs sleeping through the talent show AND family photo-shoot chaos. He's just too young to expose to that much stress....maybe next year.

I called my parents on Thanksgiving and my mom proudly told me she was making Thanksgiving from scratch!!! Kudos mom! But then my dad said scratch meant opening it from a can. Either way, sounds like mom rocked it this year. :) 

boo

BOO!

It's Lincoln's first Halloween today and I'm pretty sure he couldn't care less. He's actually napping right now, which if I had any smarts, I would be doing the same. 

Halloween is my FA-FA-FA-FAVORITE! So of course I wanted to have the BESTEST costume for Lincoln and do all the spooktacular things involved with Halloween. I tried my best to decorate our little home with painted pumpkins and cut-out bats on the wall.... BUT there's been a lot of things going on this past week....blah blah blah, so unfortunately, 2 top priorities were put on the back burner: Lincoln's costume and going to the pumpkin patch. I have to slap myself and say, Stop putting more on your plate than you can eat! There are some things that aren't worth being squeezed into "to-do's" just to say you did it..... it'll end up giving you gray hair and a heart attack because of the unneeded stress it put you through!! Take a deep breath, Elizabeth. 

Anyhoo, 

No apologies, Lincoln, for not having you in an extravagant costume or taking you to a "real" pumpkin patch farm for your first Halloween. Instead, you have a simple ghost onesie your unstressed mom made for you out of LOVE that only took 20 minutes. And instead of driving you to the pumpkin patch that  mommy REALLY wanted to go 40 minutes away, you were able to cruise in the comfort of your stroller (instead of that stupid car seat) and enjoy the view on our 10 minute walk to the most humble road-side pumpkin patch instead. And guess what? You pretty much had that WHOLE little pumpkin patch to yourself!! I think your first Halloween turned out better than what I had originally wanted.... silly mom, when will I learn.